So, before this quote that I heard at church, I was starting to go back downhill with panic attacks and just random thoughts. Before this quote, I was headed back down a dark path Without them and growing through and with them, I can only imagine how bad it’d be. Without our small group, I have no idea where I would be in my faith or in my battle with anxiety. Our church is huge on “circles are better than rows” mentality and I am so thankful for that.
Jared and I are a part of a small group at church. I most definitely have a struggle with trusting in a lot to do with faith, but I have to continually work on it. That’s not to say that it is easy, or that is easy for me to trust. I think about what He has done for me and how I can absolutely trust in Him.
That is the one way that I can calm down. Over the years, I have realized that the one thing that helps me the most, is my relationship with my heavenly Father If it’s a bad episode, I start crying and nothing makes sense. My whole body becomes warm and tingly and I go into panic. Like all of a sudden, this horrible realization of reality just smacks me across the face. I start thinking about the future ( and sometimes I’m not even thinking about anything close!) and then my mind wonders off to the fact that, crap!, one day I’m not going to be here. It hits me at the weirdest moments like a brick wall. Of course I don’t want my loved ones to pass, but more than anything, my anxiety has to do with me. Since then, I have struggled with the fear of dying. It was the first time I experienced losing a loved one. I was pretty close with him and even though he had been sick and somewhat to be expected, it rocked my world. I knew that God was speaking to me and I needed to hear exactly what Andy was saying.Īnxiety is something I have dealt with since the passing of Jared’s Grandfather. As soon as I sat down, that quote is what I heard. After she calmed down and went to sleep in her carrier, I walked back into service. This particular Sunday, I was out of the service tending to Morgan.
Our church is a partner church of North Point Community Church where Andy Stanley is the teaching pastor. This is one quote that has set me on a different path of thinking since the day I heard it at our church.
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